Joe Hockey (North Sydney, Liberal Party, Minister Assisting the Prime Minister for the Public Service) Share this | Hansard source

I thank the honourable member for Blair for his question and note that the unemployment rate in Blair is down to five per cent. I can inform the House that under our workplace relations system employees of state Labor governments, such as nurses and teachers, remain employees of the state, and nobody is forcing them to change from the state system to the federal system. That makes a lie of the claims by the Deputy Leader of the Opposition and the union bosses that somehow we have a secret plan. There are a lot of secret plans. I am aware of the dirty tricks book. Mine is a little bit more fun than everyone else’s. I have been having a good look at it. In one of the sections of the dirty tricks book, when it comes to training union delegates it says, ‘Some organisations such as the Rail, Tram and Bus Union in New South Wales, which has 13,000 bus drivers, are bringing their delegates in for a one-day course run by the ACTU on doorknocking.’ No wonder there are 1,500 bus services cancelled a week in New South Wales. All the bus drivers are out training how to doorknock for the Labor Party.

I thought: what would they take when they are doorknocking? So I come to page 40 of the dirty tricks manual. Get a load of this. Anyone who has ever doorknocked will find this interesting. ‘The suggested checklist for doorknocking kits: a nametag for volunteers, script, voter enrolment forms, citizenship forms, clipboards, pens, Your Rights at Work pamphlets, Your Rights at Work network information, local maps, public toilet listing, evaluation forms, contact details, contact details of the other coordinators.’

These poor buggers are going and knocking on the door. Obviously they left the knuckledusters and the hammer and sickle out of the backpack. Who would be capable of this? Kevin Reynolds from the CFMEU comes doorknocking. You can imagine: he goes into the nursing home and doorknocks on grandma’s door. Imagine seeing Kevin Reynolds there with his Che Guevara T-shirt or Joe McDonald from the CFMEU taking care of people in the hospital with his ‘no ticket no start’ braces and his backpack with a hammer and sickle. And of course, as the Treasurer outlined, there is Dean Mighell, elder Mighell from the ETU in Melbourne. You can imagine him delivering Meals on Wheels. You can imagine the script as he is delivering Meals on Wheels: ‘Here, love, my name is expletive Dean. I am from the expletive ETU. Here is your expletive steak and three vegies, and if you do not vote for Kevin expletive Rudd I am not going to give you your expletive meal.’

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