Anne Aly (Cowan, Australian Labor Party, Minister for Early Childhood Education) Share this | Hansard source

Before I begin my speech, I'd like to acknowledge all of my sister survivors-victims out there who are living with or recovering from family and domestic violence, and I want to take time to also pay my respects to all the women and children that we have lost—far too many. A home is supposed to represent a place of warmth, comfort, affection and security, but we know that for many people in Australia their home is a place of violence, a place of cruelty and a place of abuse.

Last Friday was the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women and it marked the beginning of the 16 days of activism against gender based violence and Western Australia's 16 days in WA campaign to stop violence against women. I've been incredibly honoured, over the years, as many women from across Australia have confided in me. They have opened up to me and shared their most vulnerable selves with me, discussing their experiences of being a survivor, their experiences of supporting a relative as that relative flees a violent situation or their experiences assisting a survivor as they reassemble the fragments of their life. In every story, I can feel the pain and I can feel the sorrow all too keenly. But I also know that there are many, many, many more stories out there—untold stories belonging to those who are still in danger and who may never make it to safety. For too long, domestic violence has been a taboo topic in our society, but we can no longer deny that it is part of everyday life for millions of individuals.

Too often here in this country, we've looked at other societies and we have had a habit of using the status of women as a yardstick of progress—measuring ourselves against those women in Iran or in other societies where perhaps they don't have as many freedoms or as much equality as we have here. But we need to stop doing this because the fact is that domestic violence in Australia is alarmingly common. Given that we are saying goodbye to an average of one woman every 10 days, it's time to stop and think about just what it is within our own society that is perpetuating these high rates of domestic violence.

We know that the COVID-19 pandemic and lockdowns only intensified violence, with an increased severity or frequency of violence, because survivors and perpetrators spent more time together and because of the pressures of economic hardship. But I also want to discuss the enormously harmful impacts of domestic violence on all members of the household. It is not the case that children are simply exposed to domestic violence when they reside with families. Rather, they are survivors in their own right. There is rarely a situation in which children and teenagers are exposed to domestic violence without also being substantially affected by this violence. There is enough research out there about the impact of domestic violence on the development of children and young people. Yet children are often treated only as witnesses but not victims of domestic violence in and of themselves.

We need a trauma informed approach to healing for both the mother and the children who are escaping family and domestic violence. Indeed, homelessness is one of the most visible effects of domestic violence on young people. A recent report by Mission Australia estimates that around 80 per cent of homelessness among young people is due to domestic violence. Domestic violence, when it occurs between intimate partners carries more victims than just those who are involved. We need to recognise that children in domestic violence situations and young people in domestic violence situations are also victims and are also living with domestic violence. When I think about the 16 days of activism against gender based violence, I think that it's apt that we start talking about these things and that we start talking about the impact on children.

Perhaps, controversially I'm also going to say this: I think we should stop talking about domestic violence as being about respect because I can tell you now that my ex-husband—my first husband—respected the women that he worked for. He was perfectly capable of showing respect to the women that served him in the shops and the women that he worked with, and the women that he encountered in his everyday life. It's not about respect; it's about power. It's about time we start calling out domestic violence and the origins of domestic violence and why it occurs and speak about it in those terms.

For all of those women out there who are living with the impacts of domestic violence: I hear you, I see you, I know you. I know what it's like to live with that trauma. I know that you carry it around with you no matter how far you've gone and no matter how far you've come in your life. I often describe it as a tiny little broken bone, a crack somewhere in your body, that you carry with you. You don't always feel it, but you always know it's there. That's the impact of the trauma of family and domestic violence, and it's a lifelong trauma. I've had women in their seventies come and talk to me about the violence they suffered 30 or 40 years ago. I've had women teenagers and women in their twenties come and talk to me about the violence they are suffering now.

In closing, I'll say that I'm proud to be part of a government that takes domestic violence seriously. I'm proud to be part of a government that has a vision to eradicate violence against women and children in a generation. I'm proud to be part of a government that has recognised intersectionality in our plan to eradicate violence against women in that generation. The fact is, and the statistics are, that women of colour are less likely to be believed when they report violence and are more likely to be victims. I want to put out a message that, if anyone out there listening needs help or support or if they know anyone who does, there are services available, so please reach out. Reach out to 1800RESPECT, Kids Helpline, Crisis Care, the Women's Domestic Violence Helpline and many more. Violence against women needs to stop, and we all have a part to play, every single one of us, men, women and children. But it won't stop if we don't talk about it. So let's use these 16 days of activism to talk about it.

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