House debates

Monday, 27 November 2023

Private Members' Business

Elimination of Violence against Women

10:57 am

Photo of Louise Miller-FrostLouise Miller-Frost (Boothby, Australian Labor Party) Share this | Hansard source

Saturday was the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women. In South Australia, it marked the end of a week where four women were killed by current or former partners—four horrific deaths. In Adelaide, thousands of women and their supporters joined Rotary, Zonta and other organisations to march to the Pioneer Women's Memorial, and I want to quote some of the words spoken at the rally by Deirdre Flynn, director of client services at Catherine House. Deirdre spoke about the need to provide some practical takeaways to keep hope alive through personal and collective acts of courage and to be truthful about where we are, because it was a really tough day and a very tough week.

Women and their supporters have been on this journey for a long time, and, for all the progress that we've made, women are still being killed or subjected to controlling and violent relationships. The awful, painful truth we must confront is that violence and murder of women will continue until we have the courage and moral fortitude to dismantle every enabling system and shut down every person or structure that resists the reconstruction of a culture of respect where women can live and move freely without fear, harassment and violence.

While there are definitely things government can do to respond to this national emergency, and I welcome the South Australian government's introduction of laws to criminalise coercive control, as a community we cannot remain idle. We each have the power to make a difference. And please know this: you should light the fire within you to do more. I'm talking about using courage as a force for change in the form of both action and resistance—courage to be what you choose, with a quiet whisper or a bold, audacious act. It can be what you choose for it to be.

Courageous people can create a revolution. History has shown us this. We can each make active choices, push back on disrespect and violence, and take action to build positive cultures and models of healthy relationships.

To women everywhere I say: if you are experiencing domestic or family violence and have not confided in anyone, resist his shame that keeps this a secret. Act by finding someone safe to tell. For all of us, knowledge is power. Learn about the signs of domestic and family violence and coercive control. Learn about healthy relationships. Teach your children about healthy, respectful relationships. Resist the urge to ignore, defend or minimise bad behaviour. It takes courage to question the safety of your relationship. For men, it takes courage to resist in engaging in the harmful banter that occurs within some male groups and settings, but if you fail to act you become part of the problem rather than a leader who has the power to create change.

For us all, it takes courage to admit someone we know could be hurting a woman. We must resist the urge to do nothing because we don't want to interfere or make it awkward. We can learn how to safely support. Let us all activate our courage, be open and ready to respond if someone confides in us, and learn about resources and supports we can direct people to. Resist the urge to downplay what they are sharing due to discomfort. It takes courage to speak the truth of what we are seeing and hearing. It takes courage to act to address the indifference encountered about male violence. Resist doing nothing. Ask your workplace to run training. Provide resources for women and for men interested in positive behaviour change.

Finally, no country anywhere has figured out how to reach those men who value women so little that they are prepared to lose everything to enact a fatal revenge by ending a woman's life. We must have the courage to confront this frightening truth and use this to propel widespread surges of action and strong resistance everywhere it's called for. Until there is an end to male violence, we can all be the eyes and ears, a resource for women needing support, and be there for men who need or want help to stop their violence. I want to thank Deirdre for her inspiring and comforting words. This is a community-wide issue that requires community-wide action and a community-wide culture change, and we all need to play our part in this movement. Lives literally depend on it.

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