Murray Watt (Queensland, Australian Labor Party) Share this | Hansard source

I move:

To take note of answers to questions asked by opposition senators to Senator Brandis.

As the President has indicated, this is likely to be the last day of this parliamentary year. That being the case, I know that there are a number of traditions that are observed on the last sitting day. Most importantly, to thank all of my colleagues in the Senate and the various staff members who keep his place running. I want to place on record my gratitude for the assistance that they have provided me and my staff as a new member of this place. I also want to acknowledge those who occupy special roles in this chamber, in particular the President and Deputy President, for the great work that they have done. Again, as has been observed, this is likely to be the Clerk's last time in this chamber. I do want to record my thanks to her for the fantastic service that she has given this chamber over the years.

There are other important roles in this chamber that it is important to acknowledge on the last day of the year as well. It would be remiss of me to not recognise Senator Macdonald, who often goes by the title of the Father of the Senate. Some of us, with Christmas coming, prefer to think of him as a certain relative who shows up to Christmas and is not really that welcome. I would never think that myself, spending so many wonderful hours with him in committee meetings! I would also like to acknowledge the conspiracist-in-chief, Senator Roberts, for his contributions over the course of this year, particularly on Twitter.

But there is another important tradition that it is important to observe on the last sitting day—that is, valedictory speeches. Just before Senator Macdonald gets excited, I am not giving my own personal valedictory speech. I intend to be back here to work with him so cooperatively next year. To the contrary, I do want to give a valedictory speech on behalf of one very long-serving senator who is leaving the chamber today. Unfortunately, that senator has omitted to give his own valedictory speech, so the responsibility falls to me to deliver it on his behalf. I am, of course, referring to the Attorney-General, Senator Brandis! Look, a valedictory speech is obviously supposed to traverse the achievements of someone over their parliamentary career. With Senator Brandis, someone as accomplished as him, there really, really is a long list of accomplishments to recognise.

It will be interesting to see how many I can fit in in the remaining time that I have. I would like to return to one of the early stages of his career in 2004, when Senator Brandis called then Prime Minister John Howard a 'lying rodent'. It was a beauty, and I know Senator Cameron has often referred to that one. In 2006, Senator Brandis achieved the rare honour of becoming a Queen's Counsel barrister, the highest honour a barrister can receive, despite having been overlooked by the bar association when he was last a barrister and not having practiced for six years. In 2006, he tried to stop the distribution of a children's book because called Robert Menzies a 'tyrant'.

If we jump ahead to 2013, he was forced to pay back over $15,000 after using entitlements to attend a wedding and then refused to apologise for it. He got accustomed to spending taxpayers' money. In 2014, he spent $15,000 on some custom-built bookshelves that were too big to move into his new office. They were a very good use of taxpayers' funds! In 2014—it was a great year for him—he tried to amend section 18C, something that we are hearing a bit more about again. Of course, he recognised the very important human right to be a bigot. He has always been a defender of those kinds of human rights. He also thought it was important to recognise the human rights of people being tortured when, in 2014, he did not want to explicitly ban the torture of foreign spies.

He got his own rights bestowed on him in 2014—and I know Senator Collins is very interested in this—when he became a member of the Savage Club, an exclusive men's only club. I have it on good authority that there may not be a Savage Club in London, but there certainly is in Wellington. Perhaps he might be headed for the High Commission of New Zealand rather than London! In 2014 again, who can forget that he could not explain what metadata was. I would really like to recite the quotes from that interview, but I do not have time. He was censured along the way, he misled the Senate and then, most seriously of all, in 2015 he committed a criminal offense—a very serious thing for an Attorney-General to do. I am talking about him wearing that grey jumper! That crime against fashion that Senator Brandis committed, which we will never forgive him for!

But we should, of course, turn to this year, because it is important to go out with a bang in your last year and has he gone out with a bang this year! In May, he issued a directive that the Solicitor-General was no longer allowed to provide independent advice. In July, he was forced to reappoint commissioners of an inquiry after appointing the wrong people two days before. In September, he stacked the independent AAT with Liberal Party mates. In October, he misled the public about the Solicitor-General's advice. He then was caught on camera calling his LNP colleagues in Queensland 'very mediocre'. We wish him very well in his retirement! (Time expired)